April 25, 2001
A group of parents were just hanging out and talking about
the pressure of raising kids. They all
agreed that it was such a struggle just to keep the kids on track. They said it was just like a row of hurdles
that you had to get the kids over. When
you got the kids over one hurdle another one that was much higher and tougher
appeared. It seems like there is no end
to the hurdles and there is no end to the struggle of raising kids. Does it ever end?
One of the parents said she would be able to relax and enjoy
her child when he finally sleeps thru the night. The parents agreed. Then
you can get more rest and get your energy back. Another parent said she would appreciate her child when she
started walking. The parents agreed with that too. Lugging those kids around is a burden. And lugging two kids around is a
back-breaker.
Another parent said she would
appreciate her child when she was out of diapers. Those diapers are so messy. Then
a parent said he would appreciate his child when she was in pre school. It would be great to get the kids in a safe
school setting for a while. Then another
parent said she would really appreciate her kids when they were in school for a
full day. Then she could catch up on
the house work during the day and even think about going back to work for a
time.
Another mother said she would
appreciate her child when he was finally out of those teen-age years. Those teen-age kids can be so moody and so
difficult. Then a parent said he would
appreciate his child when she finally graduated from high school. Then she wouldn’t be such a worry to him.
A weary mother said she was waiting
for the day when her son graduated from college. College was so expensive and such a drain on the family
resources. Then an older parent said
she was really looking forward to the day when her kids got married and settled
down. The younger parents felt
overwhelmed to hear all of the hurdles and the pressure connected to getting
their kids over those hurdles.
Finally, one older parent who was
patiently listening to the younger parents, said she had finally pushed her two kids over all of the hurdles and now they had married and moved to
the West Coast. And she only sees them
once a year at Christmas. And she
really misses them. And she wishes she
had taken the time to appreciate them when they were children. Because they grow up so fast and then they
move away.
I’ve spent a lot of time with
parents who were pushing kids over hurdles and hoping their kids would grow up quick
and give them some time to relax. Kids
do seem like they are under your feet for a long time. And kids can be a burden to parents. But kids do grow up. And they can never be kids again.
I’ve seen parents come up with
strategies to get their kids to grow up a lot faster but get very frustrated
with the process. They think that if
they can push their nine-year-old child real hard the child will be ten much
quicker. But no matter how hard you
push, it’s going to take 365 days for your nine-year-old to be ten. And even if you hire a group of specialists
to push your child, it’s still going to
take 365 days for your nine-year-old child to become ten.
We all know that a nine-year-old
child will be nine for only 365 days. So you only have 365 days to enjoy and
appreciate your nine-year-old child. Because after those 365 days he will never be nine again.